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Spiritual gifts are the abilities and aptitudes that come out as you change for God and grow in Him. It’s like a unique genius that you have that most other people do not. And although any one gift (whether spiritual or natural) may not be unique, the combination of gifts and aptitudes you have are unique. No one is good at the things you’re good at the way you are good at them. So people point out that Albert Einstein wasn’t particularly good at arithmetic. There are people who can add up a hundred numbers in their head and divide by twelve; but Einstein couldn’t. Nevertheless he was good with numbers in a different way, and it had value. It’s not any different with your gifts (whether spiritual or natural)…
But once you have a gift and recognize it, you still need to develop it. People with musical gifts tend to practice playing instruments or composing music more (not less) than people without those gifts. I know people who practiced seven hours a day for most of their lives. Athletes who are gifted at a sport like basketball, play basketball more, and drill skills more than people who have little aptitude but like the game. It’s one of the happy burdens of a gift. Great gifting means it would be a shame to leave it undeveloped. A piece of unpolished quartz is not a big deal, but diamonds in the rough need to be cleaned and crafted.
The way you develop regular gifts is: practice, practice, practice. And a bit of this applies to spiritual gifts too: someone with a speaking/teaching gift needs practice to get better. But that’s not really how spiritual gifts develop. The way you get better at spiritual gifts is you get more Holy. Get more loving. Become more like Jesus.
When someone with a gift for creating friendships or community gets MORE loving and more like Jesus, and more open, and less controlling, and less people-pleasing but more kind…this increases his spiritual gift. When a pastor goes from feeling like Sunday is an oral report he has to do, to caring about the people he’s speaking to, his preaching gets better…if he had a leadership gift, his leading gets better. Practice is fine, but with spiritual gifts the main thing is holiness.