Learning to Disagree
May 29th, 2008 by ljkim
Something many people never learn to do is how to have honest disagreements. An honest disagreement is when one says, “You think [A]… I think [B]. I’d like to persuade you of my position, and am open to you trying to persuade me of yours – but for now we disagree…and that’s ok.” Many people can’t handle the tension that an honest disagreement implies… The childish part of us wants everyone to be like us (and to like us), and feel uncomfortable in the presence of people who don’t…So they attack, insult, make things personal… The problem with this is you’ll never allow anyone to be smarter than you!
Jesus’ teaching on this was to ‘love your enemies’ – which is interesting because he doesn’t say we shouldn’t HAVE any enemies… that would mean compromising too much of what we believe (he didn’t want us to be people pleasers and pushovers), but that we should love (and be kind) even toward those with whom we disagree on everything (“enemies”)! This explains a lot about how God relates to people… His kindness and favor (for a particular person or tribe in the Bible) does not mean he AGREES with everything they do. Often times he disagrees with almost everything they (or we) do – but he has a good plan for them (and us) nonetheless, and hopes to persuade them. This can raise a sense of outrage to first-time Bible readers (it did for me), but on second reading, it sure beats the alternatives.
[About the photo: What's a post Memorial Day week without a good bbq?]
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